2010 Honda Civic Hybrid

I recently got a new car. I mean a really new car. It is a 2010 Honda Civic hybrid.   We went all out this time with a 3 year lease and a car that would save us tons on gas.   I love it.   What can I say?   It doesn’t ride quite like the New Yorker or the Park Avenue did but it is dang close.  Now that the kids all drive and have their own car <Can we have an AMEN here>  we don’t need all the room the old cars had.   I feel like I am not only saving money but being earth friendly by cutting down on my carbon footprint.

I have to say I was feeling quite good about myself.  I needed to go shopping today for some new clothes and being conscious of the new car I made sure to park it away from other cars so as not to hurt it.  It is only a month or so old so I am still in the “I need to baby my car” phase.

I started out early this morning heading out for the Dress Barn and after parking carefully went in.   A couple of hours later came out to find the car safe and secure, all by itself, and right where I left it.

The Burlington coat factory was my next destination.  I parked my brand new leased car in the middle of nowhere once more, to to keep it safe.   This time with more confidence.   I came out horrified to find a cart up against the passenger door and ran to rescue my baby.   After a close inspection I determined there were no dings or scratches and so breathed a huge sigh of relief.

At the Mall I was really leery.   That is like the smash em up derby for new cars . Knowing this I parked way out.   Out in the middle of nowhere.   So far out that you nearly have to take a cab to get to the mall.   You know the ones that only fill up the day before Christmas.  If it were a stadium I parked in the “Nose Bleed Section”.    The car looked so lonely out there.   I was satisfied and went into DSW to find the shoes to match all the clothes I bought earlier in the day.  I purchased my shoes and hiked out to my car.  It still looked lonely and secure as I had left it.

Just as I reached the front bumper a beat up, rusty, old, blue Ford pulled into the spot right next to my drivers side door.   He must have thought my car looked lonely too.  NOOOoooooooo!!!!!!!   I was swearing under my breath thinking there has to me 500 parking spots between me and the mall and he picks the spot next to my brand new car. Not the one two spaces or three spaces over or even 20 spaces over. NO RIGHT NEXT to MY NEW CAR.   My car was an island for Goodness sake!   I glared at the man who got out of the car and then watched in slow motion horror as he stood by indifferently while his little boy slammed the rusty Fords back door hard into my brand new 1 month old civic hybrid lease’s driver side door.   I gasped and yelled and ran to inspect the damage.  Sure enough there was a large scratch and dent.   The man and the boy watched me but then proceeded to walk away!

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH! “What do you think you are doing?” I asked. “This is a brand new car that you just damaged!” I managed through clenched teeth. “I need your information”, I told him.

His name was Robert and it seemed that he borrowed his cousin Jimmy’s uninsured care to take autistic, mute LaJohn to the mall. “Miss”, said Robert, “You might as well tell your insurance company you came out of the store and found it this way.   We weren’t moving so it weren’t no accident and Dejohn is autistic and can’t even talk so he doesn’t know what he did.   It’s not his fault.”

Well I could have yelled and asked him why he parked there but what good would it do. I got in my new but now dinged up car and drove home. I had enough adventure for one day.

Barbie recently turned 50 and many of us grew up with her as a roll model.  My cousin and I took her literally in so many ways.  Did you know that if Barbie were a real woman with her proportions she couldn’t stand up?  We didn’t know that at the time but that explains why when she and I were young and had a figure close to that and we were serious klutzes.  Forget the grace that we imagined she had.  Had she been human she would have shared the broken bones, scrapes, bruises and stitches with us.

Despite all of that, my cousin still wants to be Barbie.  She only laughed when I accused her of being a cougar Barbie; older sexy woman chasing younger guys with cute tushies.   “Well WHY do you want to be Barbie?”  I asked her.  “She’s got everything!” she replied with a few inappropriate pronouns thrown in. “Think about it”.  And she started naming reasons:

• She has the perfect boyfriend; handsome and doesn’t protest or argue about anything.
• She has a cute little sister that can’t steal her boyfriends or clothes.
• She drives the perfect car.
• She’s 50 and looks great; nice skin, hips, breasts and tiny waist.
• She has a townhouse.
• She has clothes to die for and all of her old stuff is collectable.
• Shoes!  OMG if you have a shoe fetish you would be in Barbie Heaven.
• She has a successful job marketing her image to little girls all over the world.
• She seems to have all the money and vacation time she wants.
• She travels with her safari outfit and her personal jet.
• She is invited to numerous balls and parties if her wardrobe is any indication.

Like I said, she has EVERYTHING!”

As a joke I sent her the Barbie song.  Little did I know it would become her ring tone.  I suppose I have to answer her some of her ideas of perfect.  Cousin, Honey, Barbie has her own problems:

• Her boyfriend is stiff and artificial.  We won’t even discuss sex here.
• Her sister doesn’t have a heart, won’t listen and runs with her friends all the time.
• Her car is for show and rides like crap.
• She suffers from scleroderma. Her skin is stretched so tight from makeovers that if she bends too often it cracks, not to mention she falls over.
• Her townhouse is stiff and uncomfortable.
• She is old enough to be considered an antique collectable.
• Her joints creak and crack if they bend at all.
• Her fingers are the first to fall off.
• Dancing is out with her joint problems and it’s difficult to market yourself with no fingers.

Yeah sis,  I’m afraid like us…Barbie is going downhill.  While gravity may not visibly take over we have advantages that she’ll never have.

• We have soft Grandma skin on our arms that love to wrap around little ones who hug us tight in all of their love and innocence.
• We have children who now ask for our advice and honor our wisdom and love us always.
• We have husbands who share their lives with us and talk to us and support us.  I won’t mention sex here either.
• We have comfortable clothes and shoes and cars (usually) in sufficient quantity and comfortable homes to put them in.  If anything breaks down we have people who will give us the shirt off their back, the shoes off their feet and a ride to work or the store.
• We have great friends and relatives who don’t abandon us if our joints don’t work, fingers fall off or our hearts tick funny.  We are everything to them.

Sis,  the money might be nice but I wouldn’t trade what I have for the world.

First and foremost, I believe that every citizen of the United States should have equal rights and Responsibilities.

I believe that any citizen in power is responsible to make all the changes they can for the better of all citizens. This is my health care proposal.  All health care coverage would be based on a sliding scale fee for all citizens.  You would get standard deductions for each family member and regional cost of living adjustments.  My argument…How long do you think the wealthy/powerful would wait before using their influence to lower health care costs if they had to pay more for it?  We would all benefit from it.  Please note that I said citizens.  Does this mean that the poor live on the backs of the wealthy?  Not for long I bet.  The wealthy have both the means and ability to make the changes that the middle class and poor do not and from what I have seen the wealthy generally do not hesitate to oppress and take advantage of those lower classes.  They can and do take money from the poor to build their coffers.

I Believe that if you enter this country illegally or do anything illegal as an alien, you should never be offered citizenship. As long as the United States is in crisis immigration should be limited. I believe that we should open our borders to only those who could benefit our country.  Someone with a job, needing an education, having an education in a needed area etc…at least until the economy improves.  If you are not a citizen you should not qualify for Social Security, Welfare, or any other entitlement.  If you are illegal and attempt to seek entitlement you should be evaluated for life or death crisis and sent right back to your country or origin for any needed treatment.  If your children are legal and you are not you have the choice to go back to your country and with or without them.  English should be the legal language.

I believe that all able bodied US Citizens should work. This means that if you can’t find a job you will be required to spend some extra time shoveling the old man next door’s walk or picking up groceries or just visiting with the elderly lady down the street.  You could mentor the young mother next door and offer babysitting while she did her volunteer time.  Young mom could take her children for a walk and each with a small bag to pick up garbage and cans along the roadway.  Cans can be theirs to keep and cash in.    If we all spent some time helping one another and doing what needs to be done we would be spending less time crying over what we don’t have and demanding entitlements we don’t deserve.  It is a proven fact that persons who feel useful have higher self esteem, suffer less depression and are more interested in the world around them.

I believe that US Citizens should have first priority for jobs with veterans topping that list. US Businesses that export jobs should be subject to a foreign employee tax that cost them as much as the United States workers would require.

I believe we should have equal trade agreements. The United States will only buy from those countries who allow us to sell equal amounts to them without all those import fees that makes our products unattractive.

I believe that our Government should outlaw “Parties”.  We all have the responsibility to look up our representatives voting history and attempt to plow through rhetoric.  Determine who is saying what.  You can find your reps history on the internet.  Just Google their name.  Right now parties seem to encourage partisan behavior.  It’s like watching a kindergarten playground with boys against the girls.

I believe the citizens of the United States should determine by vote congressional pay and benefits at the beginning of each term. Right now Congress is voting in future pay raises that can be enacted at a future date by simple inaction so it is not on their record.  Take a look and see how many of your reps abstained from voting on the new January pay raise.  That would include future benefits.  Once elected to office our congress is set for life even if they do a terrible job in a short 4 years.  They don’t have to pay for health care and receive a salary most of us could live very, very well with.  Many of us would be shocked if we knew actual numbers.  Congres/wo/men should submit pay raise requests and a monthly expense reports to a citizens oversight committee that is NOT appointed.

I believe that our education system is broken and parents and only parents should determine the best system to educate their child. Those parents should be allowed to spend their child’s portion of the education moneys on the educational style that would most benefit their child.   More money, more money is not going to get us better educators. Teachers who stop parenting and start educating with the support of the parent who is involved and chooses their child’s school will get us better educators.  Parent, Child and Educator should all be held equally accountable.  Let’s be creative.  Why shouldn’t a parent who works a second shift schedule be able to choose a second shift educational system for them?

He quotes, “The unemployment rate fell to its lowest level since August, primarily because a department survey of households found a sharp increase in the number of Americans with jobs. Analysts expected an increase to 10.1 percent.” Christopher noted here that “Seasonal Adjustments” were used in calculating.  Basically that means that the entire year was added and divided by 12 to come up with an average rather than actual figures.  Hmmmm.  Do you think when the numbers are up next summer that they will use “seasonal adjustments” to artificially lower them?  Some how I doubt that.

What happened to all of those people on extensions that fell off the unemployment roles?  Congress had approved the extensions but then didn’t approve to fund the extensions for more than a year at a time.  They missed funding it in December when it was so critical while we were all distracted by the health care bill which wasn’t and so therefore we wonder if the move was a political slight of hand so they could say Unemployment levels have dropped.   Did they forget about all those people who fell off the rolls because they used up their unemployment and there were no more extensions available?    Or did they want the people to forget?  Of course unemployment will decline and continue to decline as long as unemployment doesn’t provide a safety net for those people who are un or under-employed.  Michigan provides small amounts of help.  You can get small amounts of grocery help if you are on unemployment and believe me, it’s not enough.  No affordable medical coverage is available while you are on unemployment and once off the rolls plan on loosing your dignity, your home, your car and anything else you aren’t able to sell before any assistance is forth coming.  If you become homeless there is even a risk of loosing your children.  It is terrifying and scandalous.  Anyone out there have ideas for those of us who “fell off” the roles and therefore are no longer considered unemployed?

The jobs that are added are mostly minimum wage.   Perhaps all of our lawmakers should try to live on $7.25 per hour.   Cost of living rose 2.7% last year, and general wages rose about *2% but jobs declined by *6%.   Minimum wage didn’t recognize the increase at all.   Do the math.  It doesn’t add up. I should note here that government pay increased by 3.7%, a full 1% above the cost of living increase.  I would just like to make enough to meet the cost of living.

Bills have been submitted, such as H.R. 156 which would have prevented congress from receiving a pay raise in 2010.  It sat in the House Oversight and Government Reform Committee since its introduction on January 6, 2009.  H. R. 201 would have provided that no automatic pay adjustment for Members of Congress shall be made in the year following a fiscal year in which there is a Federal budget deficit. It got stuck in the same committee and you will find that most if not all of the bills submitted that would regulate congressional pay according to Washingtonwatch.com met the same fate.  Just in case you wanted to know I have listed the committee members below.  Please write them and vote accordingly!

Democrats

• Chairman, Edolphus Towns, New York
• Rep. Paul E. Kanjorski, Pennsylvania
• Rep. Carolyn B. Maloney, New York
• Rep. Elijah E. Cummings, Maryland
• Rep. Dennis J. Kucinich, Ohio
• Rep. John F. Tierney, Massachusetts
• Rep. Wm. Lacy Clay, Missouri
• Rep. Diane E. Watson, California
• Rep. Stephen F. Lynch, Massachusetts
• Rep. Jim Cooper, Tennessee
• Rep. Gerald E. Connolly, Virginia
• Rep. Mike Quigley, Illinois
• Rep. Marcy Kaptur, Ohio
• Rep. Eleanor Holmes Norton, District of Columbia
• Rep. Patrick Kennedy, Rhode Island
• Rep. Danny Davis, Illinois
• Rep. Chris Van Hollen, Maryland
• Rep. Henry Cuellar, Texas
• Rep. Paul W. Hodes, New Hampshire
• Rep. Christopher S. Murphy, Connecticut
• Rep. Peter Welch, Vermont
• Rep. Bill Foster, Illinois
• Rep. Jackie Speier, California
• Rep. Steve Driehaus, Ohio
• Rep. Judy Chu, California

Republicans

• Rep. Darrell Issa, California, Ranking Minority Member
• Rep. Dan Burton, Indiana
• Rep. John L. Mica, Florida
• Rep. Mark E. Souder, Indiana
• Rep. John J. Duncan, Jr., Tennessee
• Rep. Michael Turner, Ohio
• Rep. Lynn A. Westmoreland, Georgia
• Rep. Patrick T. McHenry, North Carolina
• Rep. Brian Bilbray, California
• Rep. Jim Jordan, Ohio
• Rep. Jeff Flake, Arizona
• Rep. Jeff Fortenberry, Nebraska
• Rep. Jason Chaffetz, Utah
• Rep. Aaron Schock, Illinois
• Rep. Blaine Luetkemeyer, Missouri
• Rep. Anh “Joseph” Cao, Louisiana

Operator: 911 What’s your emergency?

Me: (breathless and panicked) A big man just attacked us and is now chasing us in his truck.

Operator:  Stop in a public place and wait for help.

Me:  We WERE in a public place!  He attacked us because we stopped.  No one helped!  We will not stop until we get to your station.

Operator:  Well, Ma’am, Where are you?  You need to find a place to stop.

Me:  I’m on (insert street here) and there is no place.

About that time G slammed on the brakes and swerved and the truck flew past us long enough for me to read the license plate and I yelled it into the phone.

Operator:  Well if you are being chased, how did you get his license plate?

As I am watching the truck try to either run us over or run us off the road, I couldn’t tell which, I screamed into the phone, “did you get the number!!????”

Operator:  I want to know how you got his plate?

I am afraid I swore at her then.  I mean, why did she need to know that second?  Just in case we died that was the most important question in the world?  What?  All the skid marks from the chase wouldn’t tell them anything?  I wasn’t in the mood for what I felt was stupidity at that moment.  I was scared and to the point.  I am not sure exactly what I said but it wasn’t nice.  Something like “did you get the (insert swear word here) number!?  I won’t remember the (insert swear word here) number and I doubt we’ll be in a (insert swear word here) position to get it again. If you tell me you got the (insert swear word here) number and I live long enough, I’ll tell you how I got the (insert swear word here) number if it is so (insert swear word here) important to you!!!!!”  Well, she told me that she got the license number and I explained how we got it while flying at break neck speed down a busy 5 lane road.

The guy finally peeled off us as we turned on the street the police station was on.   I told the operator we were outside but we had to wait in the dark to be let in. We were let into the lobby and told we had to wait for an officer to show up.  G was bleeding and beginning to swell so I asked for a paper towel with cool water or ice.  No, I was told.  I would have to drive down to the store to get some.  Yeah right.  Go right back where we got mugged in the same bright yellow sports car.  We declined.  When an officer showed up a half hour later to take our report she asked…”What side of the street were you on?”

Why would that matter?  Well it seems that one side of the street was one jurisdiction and the other side of the street was their jurisdiction and it furthermore the construction closed the side of the street that was their jurisdiction which was where the assault started even though he had chased us well into their jurisdiction. So, after that long and reasonable conversation…. (Notice a trend here?) We were told to go back to the corner where we were attacked and wait for the police from the other jurisdiction.  WHAAAATTTT!???

We both looked at her like she was the one who got knocked in the head. She must have figured out that wasn’t a good idea and so offered to escort us until the other officer arrived.   After about 30 minutes or so the other officer showed up and took our report.  He told us to give the Detectives a call on Monday or Tuesday.  Why couldn’t they look for him now?  Who knows.  So we went home.  Took some pictures of the damage…aka my husbands face and crawled in bed exhausted from our ordeal.

The next day the panic remained.  What if the guy was in a gang?  What if he knew where we lived?  Didn’t it have to be on the police report?  I mean, even if the guy went to jail his homeys or pals or whatever they were now called could elicit their revenge and our kids were teens and home alone.  What about them?  So we decided not to follow up.

On Monday morning we got a call from the detective.  He told us that this was a bad guy and he wanted to get him bad.  Would we be willing to press charges?  It could have been a misdemeanor assault and all the questions we asked ourselves we asked the officer.  He would know where we lived because it would be on the court documents.  Jail time would probably be minimal and yes it was believed the guy was in a gang.  There were no guarantees that our family would be protected.  We declined.

I still think about that night.  Did we do the right thing?  We now carry pepper spray in the car and a small bat.  I also have a concealed permit.  Would any of that made any difference if I had it then?   I don’t know.  It is hard to speculate. Does the fact that our kids grew up unharmed make up for the crimes that this man committed against others after our incident?   Fear that prevents action allows things like the holocaust but it sure feels different when you have everything to loose.  So readers,  What do YOU think?

I received a phone call on my cell today and immediately recognized the call as a robo-call.  The caller identified themselves as Visa and said that my card had been deactivated.  It said that I could press 1 to reactivate it or call an 800 number to do so.

My heart did a little pitter patter while I tried to figure out WTF???!!!  The little voices in my head screamed HANG UP in my hard of hearing ear since my other one is completely deaf.   Anyway, I did listen to them (the little voices) after I wrote down all of the information the call provided.  I also checked caller ID and copied the call from number and time.  The person who invented that is a genius, but that is a story for another time.

I made a call to my bank and found that my card was fine and the numbers I had been given were not Visa’s phone numbers.  My banker recommended that I call the police and report the fraud.  I never was any good at following directions so the first thing I did was call my daughter.  It sounds perverse but there was a method to my madness.  You see we share a cell phone service so I figured her number was next.

Text to M:   CALL FROM VISA FRAUD.  STOP!!! DON’T TOUCH BUTTONS. DON’T GIVE INFORMATION!!!

Then I called the police.  It took a couple of phone numbers to get where I needed to go and a promise that someone would call me back.  By the time I had showered, dressed and started a load of laundry my phone rang.  Deputy B asked for me, introduced himself and listened politely.  I’ll spare you the redundancy of repeating my story but I provided him with all the numbers and times and what was said.

I couldn’t believe it!!!  He Googled the phone numbers!  I thought he would have some magic database at his fingers that he could put some multi-sensitive, ultra secret pass code into and find out all about the number.  Nope!  The man Googled it!  I wonder if I could be a secret spy investigator?….nah.   So sure enough, there it was on Google listed as a fraud number.

Deputy B praised my insight and told me that I had done everything exactly right.  I really tried to let that boost my ego but the truth was I was nearly fooled.  The call sounded VERY legitimate.  My red flags were that they had called my cell and I didn’t think the bank had my cell phone.  (When I checked I found I was right.)  The second was the reception was bad on the call.  The third was the little voices in my head.  Sometimes they are misleading but when something sounds wrong, it usually is.  If they had called my home phone rather than my cell I might have fallen for it and given out my info.   Now as an independent lady who just received her last unemployment check with no job in sight I have to admit that it scared the crap out of me.

The dispatch officer told me they get 25 to 30 calls like this per day and Deputy B said too many people give out the information and are either charged exorbitant phone fees and/or their identity is stolen and/or someone empties their bank account.   He also said that most of these calls are generated in another state, country or overseas and are rarely solved so he referred me to the Federal Trade Commission’s Web site:  http://www.ftc.gov/idtheft and told me to file a complaint there as well.  He gave me the report number for my county and told me to include it in the report I filed with the FTC.  Again, after a few clicks I figured out what form to fill out.  The site is pretty easy to navigate through and learned that Identity theft is a lot broader than just bank numbers and ID information.  It can include the theft of your bills.  How many times has that one strange bill been “lost in the mail”?  There is much more.  Deputy B recommended that I  get a copy of my credit report in a month or so to make sure there is nothing strange on it.  I have to give Cudo’s to the Ottawa County Sheriff’s Department.  They were kind and provided me with a wealth of information.

Criminals are getting more and more sophisticated and techno-savvy.   I like to think that I am intelligent enough to detect them but after today I have to question that.  For every crook out there, there is a new way to steal from you and me:  too many for me to think up.  It is important to file your report with your local police and the FTC so that they, and therefore we, can keep up with the new scams and fraud schemes.

I would recommend a fun, interactive website put up by the FTC to expand your knowledge http://www.onguardonline.gov/share-page.aspx. It sounds lofty doesn’t it? ;-/ but it is oh so important.  Learn how to protect yourself.  Better yet, help others learn how to protect themselves.  The tools are all there at the websites provided.

Please, I would welcome your comments concerns and questions.

Her strength was only eclipsed by her love and dedication to us and her beauty welled from within her making her always radiant despite the disease that ravaged her body. In the many conversations we had in the past few months her concerns were mostly for what her illness was doing to her family and friends. She spent much of her time trying to make her passing easier for us. I spent much of my time trying to reassure her and make her smile. She was cognitive to the last and even on her last day when she could no longer speak she made it clear that she recognized each of us and reacted to our last words together. She cried with those who cried and even managed to laugh at my last sad joke. You know that is one hell of a friend who can laugh at your stupid joke on her death bed.

Needless to say Cancer has caught my attention. Not just Lung Cancer but all cancers. My daughter-in-law was diagnosed with Ovarian Cancer around the same time and is doing well. My daughter had Cervical Cancer and she is doing well. The difference?: Both the daughter and daughter-in-law caught the cancers early. By the time my friend was diagnosed the cancer had spread to her brain, kidney and lymph nodes. It was too late.

There are a lot of awareness campaigns out there and while I chose to believe that cancer awareness means any cancer it seems that breast cancer does the best job and that is the one we see the most. Pink ribbons have their own clothing and accessory line while many of us don’t even know that lime is for lymphoma, gray for brain cancer, orange for Leukemia, and on with purple being the universal color for cancer in general.

Today, on Face Book a message turned viral. I just happened to get it from my niece. It read: “Some fun is going on………..Just write the color of your bra in your status, just the color, nothing else, and send this on to only girls, no men…..It will be neat to see if this will spread the wings of cancer awareness. It will be fun to see how long it takes before the men will wonder why all the girls have a color in their status! …. ha ha.
Someone sent this to me……. figured I’d give it a try! Can’t hurt! lol.
PS if you’re not wearing one right now, just put the last one you had on or you’re favorite“

The girls in my niece’s group took it as a fun way to spread cancer awareness and they did have fun with it as cracks flew about bra color and who should wear one and who wasn’t and who didn’t have to worry about it.

Then my cousin, a group of friends and I debated the entire concept. The conversation posted as follows:

Cousin: Why the **** is everyone’s status a color? Should I not have taken that nap? Did I miss some sort of color apocalypse and you are letting me know which hue was last to make its demise?

Rebecca: Post Bra color to raise breast cancer awareness

Sarah : PS – Men get breast cancer too. This is why I refuse to participate. It doesn’t raise awareness, it perpetuates a misconception. This is pretty much the opposite.

Andrew: nice, the perpetuation of misconception. I love it. Plus… I wanted to point out that I.. uh see stuff about breast cancer everywhere. I think anyone with eyes knows it occurs, I thought awareness was something to be raised about topics that are generally swept under the rug in order to protect reputations against the evils of reality… for example…but… hey…. perpetuation of misconception… ****** a.

Rebecca: I just lost someone from cancer. I don’t think there is such a thing as perpetual misconception when it comes to the lethality of cancer. Do I think there are other areas under and misreported? Yes. Men do get breast cancer although I don’t know any and I do know several women who have had it and died as a result. I choose not to be so narrow in my thought process that I don’t appreciate the spirit in which the reminder was submitted.

Sarah: I too recently lost someone close to me to breast cancer. I’m not opposed to the message; I’m opposed to the exclusivity. The actual FB message being sent around instructs women to “not tell the boys”, like it’s some kind of cutesy little club. How is it at all responsible or awareness-promoting to exclude potential victims in an awareness campaign? Men go without diagnosis because they don’t know they can get breast cancer, and this silly little trend serves to perpetuate that.

Andrew: I personally have had loved ones suffer and die from breast cancer. It doesn’t remove my ability to step outside the frame work and see that Children’s Leukemia Awareness, for example, doesn’t seem to have as much steam as Breast cancer awareness. Not that one is worse than the other, but sometimes being a strong proponent for one specific thing unconsciously diminishes a different end of the spectrum.

Cousin: What the **** happened here? Personally, my bra is red and I don’t give a **** about that or what color anyone else is. I am also well educated on breast cancer as I think most everyone is these days. Breast cancer awareness is everywhere to the point that I think it may be being used as a marketing ploy to buy certain cereal or toothpaste. ‘we … See More are raising awareness so buy our sh*t’ I am too exhausted to partake in a fb debate about breast cancer and am not trying to diminish the severity of breast cancer but agree that the focus could be on something that people aren’t as aware of. I understand the spirit of the ‘game’ and also understand the misconceptions that people have. I’m done as I don’t really have anything worthwhile to say.

Claire: when I got the message, it didn’t say anything about breast cancer. It said “a silly and fun little game.” Frankly, it’s more than a bit ridiculous to imagine that posting the color of one’s bra will start one thinking more about breast cancer and doing something to further the cause of fighting said illness. It’s as stupid to me as the idea that clicking the “join” button on a face book cause actually does ANYTHING to further a real cause.

Cousin: Agreed Claire. I was wondering myself how posting your bra color was going to do anything at all and I’m glad they made breast cancer into such a fun little game! Maybe next we can go to the children’s hospital and kick over some kids in wheelchairs. Wouldn’t that raise awareness?

Rebecca: Thanks everyone for your insight. LOL I get the picture cousin. It is kind of kicking someone who is already down. The bra for the breast less? Like smog for lung, pregnancy for uterine or ovarian cancer. It is a new perspective.

So readers, I am asking you what you think. Do you see too many reminders of one thing and not enough of another? Are we perpetuating a misconception as Sarah suggested? Is there another side of this we missed? Please…leave your comments. I look forward to hearing them.

Wow!  Was this good news?   I’ve been looking for a job for a year.  I was excited.  As I read further my excitement waned.  They provided a list:

“1) Any additional background information that you feel will show us that you are the right choice for the job
2) a credit report to verify your details (DO NOT email us this info)
3) The best time for us to hold the interview. Morning (8-12) or evening (1-5)
Please note: A negative credit rating will not be a determining factor in your eventual employment, (your credit itself is not relevant), a full credit check however does allow us to verify accurately, legal US citizenship, employment history, social security references and a verifiable confirmation of address. This will help expedite the process in the interview phase.  To get your free report we recommend using this provider: Free Credit Report Once again, thank you for your interest in the position; I look forward to hearing back from you.   Warm Regards,  Heather Stevens SunTech-Corp Human Resources Director THE TECHNOLOGY THAT BRIGHTENS UP YOUR TOMORROW”

Now by the time I got to the bottom of this letter I was really let down and didn’t want to be.  So, just in case I Googled the SunTech-Corp and the most I could come up with was a canvas company in Florida.  For my second ‘just in case’ I did respond with, “I would prefer to keep my personal information private until I learn more about your company.  If offered the position on the contingency of the credit report, I will provide it at that time.”  I was not surprised that I didn’t receive an answer but was still disappointed.  This was a common phishing scam that was attempting to steal my personal information.  Don’t let the caution of not mailing the information fool you.  My resume is meant to show and intelligent sophisticated executive.  The phishers who target that group has to be sophisticated and subtle enough to fool their targets.  There were several things that clued me in.   Your credit report has all of your personal information and will let the person scamming you have all the information they would ever need to steal your identity.  Drivers License, Social Security Card and/or passport would give an employer all they need for your I-9 and they cannot request it until AFTER they hire you.

This week I got a new letter.  From employment ad on Craigs list PostingID: 1487915012 that I responded to.  The ad looked legitimate.  The response did not.

“RE: Admin Assistant

From: Victor Daniels<assistantposition2010@live.com>

Hello,  I received your e-mail. I’m sure you’ll understand I tend to have a very busy schedule at this point.I’m Victor Daniels from the North Side Of Chicago. I’m a lawyer by profession and I have been pretty successful in a handful of ventures I get involved in; from litigations, stock market and real estate to various welfare and community service programs, I mostly get my hands occupied, so it is imperative for me to have a worthy assistant who can monitor and keep me up to date with my activities.
Please note that this position is not office-based for now because of my frequent travels and tight schedules, it’s a part-time, work -from-home job and the flexibility means that there will be busier weeks than others, so it’s a little difficult to pinpoint the exact number of hours you’ll be doing per week but i can estimate the regular 20hrs time frame for a part time job.If you can manage your time properly, this job may even give you some extra time to do something else on the side.
As I have said, I’d want us to get started with things as soon as possible. I do have a pile-up of work and a number of unattended chores which you can immediately assist me with, I hope we can meet up with the workload eventually.Permit me to use the coming week to test your efficiency and diligence towards all this, also to work out your time schedule and fit it to mine. I really need to find the perfect person for this job, I’m confident you can take up the challenge and on the long-run, we should have a relatively sound working relationship between us.
I’d want us to meet up on Yahoo chat as soon as possible so we can discuss this extensively, more so it’s easier for me to convey information once I’m online. My Yahoo ID is westvicky1880 . It may be a little difficult working out the time difference between us initially, with time however, we should get used to it.
I’m online most of the time when I’m not out or in a meeting so we should be able to have a chat sooner than you think. Do try to keep a date..I am glad you are willing to work with me and i promise to be a good boss. I have been checking my files and what i would want you to do for me this week is to run some errands for an orphanage home i’m donating to. I do this around festive periods like this. The funds will be in form of a check and it will be sent over to you from one of my clients and i have some list to email you once you received the funds,You will make some arrangements by buying some stuff for the kids in the nearest store arround you so you can mail them out to an orphanage i mostly make out donations to.
DESCRIPTION OF JOB: Process all owner distribution batches – print checks, statements and mail on a timely basis.  Assisting with management of employee’s  checking store supplies and placing orders  Process rental applications in Resident Data.  Type various letters ,Prepare 3 Day Notices.  Retrieve and process faxes  Send unpaid rent notifications to tenants.  Deposit and monitor payments of all owner contributions.
I will get you more information on that,I will like you to get back to me with your Contact Details such as:  Full Name:  Full Contact Address:  City:  ZIP Code: State:
Phone Number:  Your present occupation:  Age:  sex:
Once i receive your contact information i will get back to you with the task for this week,Understand that you will be paid $1000 bi-weekly and the paycheck will be mailed to your address in your name. Like i mentioned earlier, this is going to be a part time work from home job until you prove very efficiently enough to get promoted to a full time position in a physical location.I’m currently in UK for work now……..
Hope i am clear with that. Get back as soon as possible..  Victor.”

There are quite a few Red Flags that this one was a scam.  The first few were grammar, spelling and phraseology.   (I have noted the grammar errors in red. the spelling in blue and the strange phrases in green.) There were multiple errors that a lawyer should not have made.  The phraseology also made me believe that English was not the authors first language.   The more I read the more I found. (Note the bold Black)  A lawyer especially  should know that it is illegal to ask how old you are and what your sex is.  Doing a little more research on Google,  I discovered there was no attorney by this name listed with the Illinois State Bar nor in any of the states surrounding it.  If it is too good to be true, it probably is.   What is this scam?  What did he want?  I would think that it probably wasn’t legal and would be concerned regarding the promised pay check if it did follow through to a “position.”  This person asked for personal information because while I have my resume out there I do not post my address or phone on it.  Only my email address which also has no information connected to it.

Another Scam that seems to be pretty common was money laundering/bank fraud scams.  The potential employer would send you checks which you would deposit in an account in your name and then send monthly money orders (not checks) back to them overseas.  You were assured that you would be paid well and it was totally legal.

There is no way to keep up with all of the slimes and slugs out there who try to take advantage of you in this vulnerable time, but you can avoid getting caught in any of the millions of existing and future scams by educating yourself.  The FBI maintains a fraud website http://www.fbi.gov/majcases/fraud/fraudschemes.htm that provides information on how to prevent fraud and what to do when you are caught up in it.  Monster has a great page on how to recognize employer scams. http://help.monster.com/besafe/ Consumer action has a booklet available if you know someone who doesn’t have internet.   http://www.consumeraction.gov/ All of these sites and the links connected with them provide the savvy consumer what they need to identify and prevent fraud.   Encourage your local news to research and do a specific story on consumer fraud and target it to the relevant topic of prevalent frauds directed specifically at America’s vulnerable and frantic unemployed.  Stay safe out there!

Daughter-in-law (sweet and tactful): “It’s the experience you should be proud of. 50 years of experience and life accomplishments is nothing to sneeze at.”

Daughter (Just as sweet but not so tactful): “Aw Mom, you don’t look THAT old.”  [I should mention that this was the same daughter who, 5 years ago, picked through my head like a spider monkey when she first figured out that those blond highlights (better known as stress highlights) were actually streaks of gray hair.]   Child was so observant she hadn’t noticed them in the previous 5 years.

I’m in good company.   Sharon Stone,  Susan Sarandon,  Dolly Parton, Olivia Newton John, and Sofia Loren just to name a few are cougars that don’t look a day over 25 and if I could afford it so would I.   Let’s not forget Barbie.  No sag, no drag and surgery free.   It’s not so bad.  I could look like Keith Richards.

All I can think about turning 50 is that I am just middle aged! To me, old age will always be older than I am.  None the less things started happening little by little.   Slowly at first so I could dismiss them as some sort of weird fluke.  Things that I would have continued to ignore if they weren’t as obvious as a lit neon sign pasted to my forehead.

I was in my mid 40’s when I had my first physical adventure with the unusual.  I spent a good many hours brushing my hair out of my eyes.  I chatted with co-workers, shopped and did otherwise public things before I got home only to discover that the one 10 inch hair that had been harassing me all day was connected, not to my head, as I first thought, but to my eyebrow.  I was startled and promptly plucked.  Before too long it became too much to pluck and I began to have them waxed until one day my beautician suggested I “trim them” as well as wax them.  When did those lovely gentile arches morph into a large dark furry caterpillar crawling all the way across my forehead?   Again my beautician with more talent than tact explained softly, “That happens to a lot of older ladies.”

My next misadventure was again when my beautician suggested gently that I might want to wax my mustache.  WHAT MUSTACHE??!!  I looked in the mirror and a 5 o’clock shadow from my upper lip jumped out of the mirror and vibrated before my horrified eyes.  I thought eyebrow waxing was bad.  My husband thought I was kidding when I would tell him I was going out to get my lip ripped until one day he waited in the car and stared in horror as I came out looking like someone had given my upper lip 50 lashes.

Then my chin began acting out.  Nothing soft and gentle like my eyebrows migrating.  Oh, no, not for me.   I had hairs that rivaled the biblical mote and needle sharp erupting in greater and greater quantity. Not only that but when they were plucked, waxed, shaved, sanded, clipped or vanished with depilatories they not only came back with a vengeance but left ugly acne looking rashes that my doctor called Pseudofolliculitis barbae or, in the layman’s terms that I understood,  ingrown hairs.  Seems curly haired people are prone. Now not only do I have a hormone problem, I have one that broadcast itself in the form of some sort of plague on my face and neck. (If any of you have found a low income cure I’d be happy to hear it)

I discovered my nose hair was out of control when I spent several days with a wadded tissue trying to subtly scratch irresistibly itchy nostrils and discovered spider web hair, not only sticking out of my nose in every direction but accumulating whatever came it’s way.  When I was sure the entire world thought I picked my nose or thought I should, I went to the drug store to buy one of those little scissors that are used for just such a purpose.  Don’t let them kid you!  Those safety scissors are anything but safe.  Even after years of practice I keep the Neosporin and a cotton ball close by for when I invariably take a chunk of skin along with hair out of my nose.

Then came the day when I laughed and had to change my slacks.  Not too long after that it was a sneeze or a cough.  Weak bladder muscles from having so many children I was told.  OH YEAH!?  Then how come it waited until all of my children reached adulthood?!!  THAT was an age thing!  <SIGH>

Mentally I barely notice.  Oh sure, I have offended my friends oncologist by glancing at the doctor and telling her, “They get younger and younger.”  And have you seen these kids driving?  GOODNESS!  They look all of 8. (Drive like it too sometimes)  I would like to think that managers interviewing me for jobs are impressed by my knowledge rather than thinking I’m rigid and can’t keep up with my profession even though they do look like they are right out of high school and can’t possibly have enough experience to know that.

I can explain away a lot of the things I hear my friends complain about.  I can take everything heading south.  I kind of expected that.  Anyone who has bore a number of children can experience sag  relatively early in life.  Smiling and smoking added a few lines.  I had to buy new teeth but I come from a family with notoriously bad teeth.  I got trifocals but I have had bifocals since I was 16.  A few more pounds packed on.  OK…A lot of pounds packed on.  I overeat.    People in regular conversation speak softer.  Hot flashes better known as tropical moments or personal summers were also easy to deal with since I had gone through surgical menopause in my late 20’s.  I could have done without the sweats but you take ‘em as you get ‘em.  We slow down, but hey, we’ve worked hard and this is the way of getting older…not old.  I have not TURNED 50 like milk that has turned sour.  I have reached 50 despite the obstacles that sought to prevent me.  I would like to think it is with grace and elegance.    If not, it will be with attitude, like Maxine.  I think I will like being 50.

I mentally flogged myself.

When I found out that the emergency extensions EXPIRED December 31, 2009 every hair on my body stood at attention, a searing pain developed in my temple and my left eye twitched uncontrollably.   Realizing that it was already December and I had less than thirty days left I mentally flogged myself.  I should have paid more attention.  I should have asked more questions.  I should have done more research.  I should have, could have…well, you get the drift.

So, me being me, I dove into the internet and researched until both eyes began to twitch.  I found out our optimistic political leaders had determined that the recession/depression would be over by 2010.  Hey, I thought it would be over by 2010.  They have extended the most depressed states until mid February, but given present circumstances 6 weeks may not be long enough.  [1]70,000 Michigan unemployed workers stand to drop off the emergency rolls in February and that is less than 10% of the total unemployed in the state.

[1]“On Nov. 6, President Barack Obama signed a bill giving an additional 14 weeks to all states, plus the six weeks for the high-unemployment states. But because there aren’t that many weeks left in the year, no one could get the extra weeks without moving the expiration date.”

That move could cost American taxpayers as much as 10 billion (yep, I said 10 Billion) dollars.  So congress hesitates to loose the votes of the 85% of the population who are employed.  I think at this point my family thought I developed Turrets.  Sure dropping the numbers off the unemployment rolls would improve our statistics.  Hey, we might only have 14% unemployment.  The reality would be that 70,000 persons would be without an income and I would be one of them.

When I lost my job to the economy on New Years Eve last year I thought that as a college grad and with the experience and skills I possess I would be able to find another job anytime I wanted to.  I looked until finding a job had become a full time job in itself.  I sold myself to employers until I believed all the propaganda I was selling and became discouraged enough to coin my talents as propaganda when rejection after rejection landed in my lap.

I should have, could have… well you know.   What I didn’t realize until I Googled “Unemployment” was that I started out with 3 strikes against me.  The first was the fact that I live in a blue collar state with the highest unemployment rate in the nation.  Over 15% of Michigan workers are on the unemployment rolls.  My dreams were punctuated with nightmare lines of people; young and old, educated and experienced workers who all had just a slightly better something than I did.

"I Googled unemployment"

My second strike is the fact that I just turned 50.  That’s supposed to mean I am a guru of experience and knowledge and all youthful inexperience should look to me for wisdom.  HA! In another century maybe!  Somehow 50 turned me into an old lecturing stupid old woman in employers eyes.  I heard from managers who didn’t look old enough to drive, “We have a young, exciting office and we don’t think you fit”.  What does it say about me that I wanted lecture the smug condescension right off their face.  Yep, they were right…I probably don’t fit.    I’ve also heard, “You are overqualified and we can’t afford you and if we could we don’t think you would stay”.  I got news for them; I’ll clean out sewers if it means not eating out of trash cans or freezing to death.   OK, I am exaggerating about the freezing to death, but keep in mind that this IS the reality in some cases.  As for staying…pay me a living wage and I’ll be your most devoted employee.

My third strike is that I am connected here.  Relocating is not a good option for me. I own a home and am solidly rooted.  I didn’t say it wasn’t an option, just not a good one.  My home isn’t worth half of what I paid for it and most of us have heard of the auction in which Michigan couldn’t sell homes valued at $1.00.   Unemployment doesn’t exactly provide a relocation allowance.  In fact, most people on unemployment are below the poverty level.  It’s a slow and torturous financial death.  I can picture my Buick roof piled so high with stuff that it won’t fit under the gas station awning as I try to move as many of my belongings hundreds or even thousands of miles to a job in another state.

So what is my point?  Let’s practice some uncommon sense.  What are our options?  70,000 people in the State of Michigan alone will be without an income once the extensions expire.  Well, we could let them starve.  I mean it’s their own fault they are in this condition.  Right?  The majority of the population has jobs.  You get rid of the chaff in hard times…Soooo…

I may get letters for this because I am going on my soapbox for a paragraph or two.  I think we are in a really bad state if we’ve lost our compassion.  We were founded on freedom and God and country.  We came to America to get away from poor houses where people starved to death and no one noticed.  We moved away from a class system where the rich felt that the lower class was exactly that.  We were founded on biblical principals in which neighbors helped neighbors without strings attached and those down on their luck were helped until luck improved.  I think it’s ironic that we should remember Job in these JOBless times.

I’d like to call everyone to action.  What can you do?  I don’t know…What CAN you do?  Can you write your congressmen and women asking for the extension?  Can you buy an extra loaf of bread for the overwhelmed food pantries?  Can you buy a Christmas present for a child or shovel the drive of an elderly person?  What can YOU do? Let’s step back in time and recapture our compassion.  OK…I am stepping down now.

[1] December 03. 2009 1:00AM  Bill would extend Michigan jobless pay 6 more weeks  Quote from Deb Price / Detroit News Washington Bureau